Ugh.
I'm always upfront and honest on here, cause thats what I think you guys want most, it's what I like when I read blogs, some one honest, real and relatable.
Sorry for the lack there of magic and fluffy unicorn poo here.
But for real, lately my eating has just sucked.
And in the worst way possible.
I've been bored eating a lot, not even on bad foods, thats the kicker here, i've been over eating on the healthy stuff. I'm not even really hungry. I just WANT the food. That really is the hardest thing to cope with when trying to lose weight and maintain a healthy lifestyle. I want to eat the shit food, I want to eat the healthy food.
I.Just.Want.Food.
90% of the time I'm not even hungry, I just WANT it. Most of the time I can fend it off and control myself, but come on I'm only human.
It sucks cause the girls I work with either are skinny and eat what they want and don't care and then there are the girls who are just comfortable how they are and eat what they want. No one is concerned with their health -- AT ALL. We have monthly meetings and if its your birthday month you get to pick a cake flavor you want. I choose a fruit plate for the meeting today and everyone stared at me like I was from another planet. Like sorry folks I don't want the cake, I don't need the cake, I want fresh fruit. But these same girls ALWAYS and I mean ALLLLLLWWAAAYYYYSSS have shit food they bring and keep in the breakroom to share.
Ugh.
My weakness...Lofthouse Sugar Cookies, these were a vise of mine when I was bigger, I'm not going to lie, I could down the whole package with out a second thought and still want more. These were like Jesus tears plated in gold to my fatty mcpatty self. Now I see them and I remember them and I want one, so so so bad, but I tell myself no and then heres the issue. To keep myself from eating something bad I substitute it with something good. Not a bad idea right?
Most of the time.
Lately I've been OVER substituting with the good stuff and then I've just made it worse by eating more of this than I needed/wanted too.
(I love all these healthy options a little too much)
I haven't managed to gain any weight back (thank you baby Jesus) but I'm not losing any at all. And I know I'm to blame. So yesterday I decided to reallly be hard on myself. Every time I wanted to eat shit food, I got it and then I stepped on it, then I couldn't eat it at all. To the trash it went. Well it seemed to work for the day.
But I made it through one day, so the next day will be easier, right?
I just got to get my mind back in the game. I too quickly forget how far I've come and focus on how far I'm not going. Its tough.
School of hard knocks, I'm a grad.
I know what I got to do to get back on track. And Its all in my head, my mind is whats being fat. That is where I need to get things straight.
Any tips out there to help keep your mind on track?!
Now as always, Linking up with Skinny Meg for Workout Wednesday
Today I'm giving ya'll a playlist. This is what I listen to when I run or when I'm doing my own thing and need to just get down and power through.
Acapella -Karmin
Applause -Lady Gaga
Berzerk - Eminem
Best Song Ever - One Direction
Louder - Chris Willis
Donald Trump - Mac Miller
Entertainment - Sean Paul
Holy Grail - Jay Z
Like a Champion - Selena Gomez
Roar - Katy Perry
Royals - Lorde
Swagger Jagger - Cher Lloyd
23 -Mike Will Made-It Feat Miley Cyrus
Wrecking Ball -Miley Cyrus
We Can't Stop - Miley Cyrus
Turn the Night Up -Enrique Iglesias
Get Down with The Sickness - Skrillex Remix
Remember the Name - Fort Minor
People Like Us - Kelly Clarkson
Rock THe Body - Bob Sinclar
23 was the song that got me across the finish line at my 5K
What songs gets you going??
Have a wonderful wednesday!!
-J
hang tough!
ReplyDeleteGood on the refocus but don't be so hard on yourself. Really. Allow yourself some indulgence because I think it protects against a full bat shit-crazy eating attack. For me, when someone makes homemade desserts and brings them to work, I'm having a small piece. That is love in a spoonful and I enjoy it.
ReplyDeleteAnd you really might be hungrier, you've got so much muscle now that demands feeding. I do the same thing. I try an apple. Wait. Still hungry. Almonds. Still hungry. Drink something. Still frickin' hungry. Protein bar. Slightly less hungry. When's dinner?
Oh I hate it when this happens! I normally keep a bottle of water with me at all times or at work I keep green tea. Yes, its not the food we want but it has helped me when I get those cravings. I add some honey too. Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteMaria @ The Good Life
I usually try to have a piece of gum or brush my teeth! :) The "minty" taste helps take away the urge to keep eating!!
ReplyDeleteThose Lofthouse cookies are yummy. My boys love them and if they are at the store with me, we'll usually end up getting some. I like the pink or yellow frosting, but for some reason the darker pink (raspberry) or blue frosting turns me off.
ReplyDeleteI try to exercise to ease the urge ... I have a home gym downstairs so it's easy for me to just pop down there for 20minutes at any time. Also I'll enter the food in my food diary BEFORE I eat it, and sometimes seeing how many calories it is will end up dissuading me from actually eating it!
Those cookies are DELICIOUS (insert drooling face). But seriously, I love that you are honest and you talk about the good and the bad. You've come so far, I know you will overcome this overeating obstacle.
ReplyDeleteHang in there, this will pass and you'll look back and be so proud of yourself for making it through this... we'll call it a "phase". :)
ReplyDeleteI usually eat better when I feel good about what I'm doing workout wise. When I go on a lazy kick and don't work out for a few days thats when my eating sucks. But that's just me.
ReplyDeleteThank you for this post. I do the exact same thing. I just love the way eating makes me feel, even though I know I am only over eating bc of emotional issues. I have to make my kids healthy snacks for lunches which is hard bc then its in the house. Plantain crackers I can eat like chips. And dried fruit is my sugar fix when Im eating right but has so many calories:( I just try and stay busy and away from food. I just started following Chris powell and the reward day made me gain 3 pds FACK. I think I over did it lol. I make peppermint tea or dandelion root tea (good for liver) and add sweet leaf vanilla stevia. So yummy and feels like a treat.
ReplyDelete