Intimidated Shmintated

Ugh packing and sorting has consumed my life, that and a few minutes of Netflix distractions. This weekends the move and next weeks the garage sale. If I can survive until then it might just be a miracle. 

This is how I hope it goes, the less trips the better.

But enough of my whineyness. The hub has made the switch to a day job, which means we are up and at em at 7/730 and passed out before 1 am.  That for us is a complete flip, we've been doing the night thing for over 2 years. 

So yesterday was my first day of going to the gym in the morning with the majority of the planet. No longer was it just me and maybe one or two stragglers. I was there among about a dozen people in the small gym. I was completely intimidated. I'd be lying if I said I didn't want to turn around and run out the door and hide in my car. But they'd seen me, If I ran out now, they'd know I was scared, or just really socially awkward. I kept walking, set my stuff down and then just decided to fake it. I puffed my chest out like I was big and bad and walked over and started my day. There was this skinny girl there working out with her boyfriend, ahhh the nerves came creeping back. I always wanted to be the skinny girl, I always used to think that skinny automatically ment fit(Thanks for the twisted views society). 

What happened to these views?

But now I know, fit means fit, fit doesn't have a weight restriction or a pants size. Fit means being the best you, you are capable of pushing yourself to be and striving for health not perfection- well thats what it means to me. But this girl was side eyeing me and mirroring me and I felt allllll the judgement her eyes had to offer. I had this feeling that maybe it was a mistake, maybe I was out of place here, I was to weak to be here. Thats when my day got made. I don't judge people on what they can and can't lift, because I'm my only competition, but it never hurts to have that satisfying feeling of a reality check. I glanced at me in the mirror and there she was doing calf raises with 5's and her boyfriend was near me doing this weird circus version of curls. I mean it was too high of a weight for him and he was having to thrust/throw the weight up to even make the curl motion. That was it, I wasn't weak, I wasn't out of place, I belonged. I was owning chest day, I PR'd on incline dumbbell press using 35's- I was strong. She was skinny, I was fit. My body has muscle definition (somes better than none) she just was skinny. Which it shouldn't make me feel better because I was comparing myself, but it just did today. It made me feel better about getting up among the normals. When I left the gym I was puffed out again, but it wasn't because I was faking it, it was because I felt like a bad ass, because I was being the best me and didn't let others judging looks or bodies I used to swoon over get me down or stop me.

Don't let anything stop you from achieving the goals you want to.

What insecurities have you pushed aside and made yourself proud for achieving?

-J

Moving Kaos and Instagram Filters

And it's Monday again. I'm not sure where I stepped on the hyper drive button but I'd sure like to turn it off. Lately I've been so busy the days are flying by.

We had a wedding this weekend that the hub was in, so we spent all weekend between picking up a tux, rehearsals, and then the actual wedding. The wedding was beautiful and it went perfectly, I couldn't be more happy for our friends.

At most weddings people are picking up a drunken stupor or a one night stand, me? I picked up a killer sunburn.

Only, plus was I felt my back definition looked good! Aloe Vera is my new best friend.

In the little bit of free time I've been intensely packing. We are moving at the end of this week and over the course of the next two weeks. I've been going through every nook and cranny deciding if that piece of paper I scribbled on two years ago is keep sell or toss. Luckily my sell piles are outweighing my keep piles. The toss piles are making me feel nice and tidy though.

The first two are sell piles, yeah that second one is alllll clothes and shoes. The last picture is my keep pile along with a container full of clothes. I'm having a garage sale with a lady I work with next weekend, so hopefully that goes good!

Today I'm off until the afternoon so I'm going to continue cleaning out cabinets, some food prep and other household fun stuff. Please bare with me while I'm moving, my posts may be off, random or late, but I will do my best :)

Now something that has been bothering me...

Instagram Filters.

I love instagram. It's my favorite form of social media. I love following inspirational people and those that I just enjoy, like Val Holly Tatum Michelle Skinny Meg ECT. I have come to despise those that overuse filters. Why oh why must you take a picture at a ridiculously unnatural angle, in a poorly lit area, pile on the filters, blur part of it out and then put it up acting like its all natural?? WHY? It really kills me. I just don't understand. Yes I do use filters, do I use them on pictures of my progress or of me in general? Not unless I'm playing around, on my progress- no way jose. I use filters on nature shots or of random things I come across. I guess what I'm not understanding is how it can be considered a progress picture if it is over edited and you can't tell what the person really looks like. Hell they show progress, but they also show some killer photoshop skills. What throws me even move is the over edited pictures, but in others pictures of them or in candid shots, its like a completely different person. I guess what my mini rant is all about is just honesty. I keep it honest on instagram because its me and its who I am and its how my journey is going. It's not about how skinny an app and a filter can make me look. Thats also how I choose who I follow for inspiration, how many of their photos are filtered more than your water? 

End of rant :)

Who are your favorite IG accounts to follow?

What are you plans for the day/week?

-J

TGIFF!

(Thank God it's flex break Friday!)

So first off you need to head over to Holly's blog and enter her monthly awesome Target Giftcard Giveaway.  Tarrrrjaaayyy is where the awesome stuff is. I love their home decor section, I could spend a fortune there and still not have enough. 

 Also why you clicking around head over to Facebook and like Tatam and I's new page Swole Sistas. It's all about fitness, workouts, recipes motivation. You can also find Tatum on IG @fittatum . 

 While I was hanging out on Holly's page yesterday I saw her repost of a post mimicking a Myspace question-a-ma-jig. It looked like fun so I decided to jump on the non existent bandwagon...  

Thinking... about the nerves I need to summon up to try on dresses in a couple hours for a wedding I have to go to tomorrow. I haven't really worn a dress since my wedding and that was well over 70 pounds ago.  

Wearing... My stained Tar-Jay sweats and tee shirt- comfy not glamour in the mornings for me. 

 Watching... House - I love this show, a little too much. Thank you Netflix for the countless episodes of it. Who doesn't love Hugh Laurie ??  

Liking... The fact that at my yearly check up, my Doctor didn't recognize me. And through the entire awkward procedure she couldn't stop commenting on how amazing I looked and my new little body. She also couldn't stop looking at last years chart.. Talk about a great way to start the day, beside the "lady" parts of the check up.  

Loving... The freakin' amazing cardstock Val sent me via snail mail  

 Testing... wearing tank tops (that aren't workout tanks) in public more often. They used to scare me, but now their growing on me.. 

 Laughing... at a bunch of dumb jokes I can't stop telling anyone and everyone.. 

* Two dyslexics walk into a bra.. 

 * A pirate walks into a bar with the ship's steering wheel stuck to the front of his pants. The bartender asks " Doesn't that hurt?" The pirate growls, "Arghh it's drivin' me nuts." 

 *What's Forrest Gumps password?

 - 1Forrest1 

 I still laugh too hard at these.. oh lawdy.  

We are off for a speedy trip to town to pick up a tux, me a dress, groceries, and of course a cheat meal. Then we have to rocket over to a two horse town for the wedding rehearsal and then home in time just to hit the gym.  

What are your weekend plans?  

Tell me a dumb joke, I love 'em! 

-J

Bikini Check In, Body Image and a Workout!

Happy Freaking Hump Day!

I have no clue who slipped happy pills into my tea this week but I've just been in a great mood lately! So I'm not complaining! As you all may know, I've been working my butt off on a bikini challenge, read about it HERE. Yesterday marked day 30- so it was time for a serious check in. 

After 30 days of clean eating (with one weekly cheat meal),  working out 6 days a week, drinking around 130 ounces of water a day and I've been working on getting better sleep. Holy cow, why I ever let myself forget that this system is the best for me I will never know. I'm feeling so good. I'm sleeping through the night, I used to wake up frequently, but now I only wake up once for a potty break due to my water intake. My energy levels in the morning are through the roof and my confidence is just climbing now. I was completely uncomfortable in a bikini before and now I'm getting more and more at home in it. I've also managed to lose 4 pounds and a good amount of inches, but I'm in it for the physical results not my relationship with gravity.

Its really hard to trust the process sometimes, but its what I've had to do. I can't tell you how many times I got bored and just opened the cabinets and stared at the hubs fruit gushers. I even opened a pack just to get a smell of them when I was taking him some. I didn't want them, I wasn't hungry but my mind was telling me i NEEded them, but I didn't. I was just bored, plain bored and the colors and smell attracted me. But I didn't let it get to me. Having Tatum for accountability has been beyond amazing. Any time I'm tempted at home or work, I sent her a picture or a video and she'd talk me down from throwing away all the hard work. Like when a girl at work was enjoying a pizza, twix or sugar cookies, man it was hard. But I did the same for her. Its so nice to have support. I'm loving having my husband at the gym with me, he sees me working hard and will come over and cheer me on or give me a high five and that just makes me feel even better.

Here are my Day 1/ Day 30 progress pictures:

I'm pretty happy! I can't wait to see what the next 30 days brings!

Now for Tatum..

Starting Weight: 212 

Current Weight: 197.8

When Jess asked me if I wanted to do a bikini challenge with her starting in March I was stoked.  I mean, I was totally having trouble staying on track eating clean wise and I needed an extra push.  We both had our trainers who gave us an individualized plan and we thought setting up a 60 day challenge to keep each other accountable would be awesome!

So far, we were right.  After 30 days of combining eating clean and following my workout program has left me feeling incredible.  I mean, I literally feel different.  My brain is more balanced, I think clearer.  I’m doing better on my school work. (Yeah, I’m in college.) My body feels good in general –it’s easier for me to digest and process foods.

 Being consistent has been a game changer for me these past four weeks.  

Jess has also been a huge help.  When we see food that isn’t in our meal plan in our house or work we immediately text each other a pic and complain about how bad we want it.  Then we help each other not indulge… Even though it’s hard and she isn’t actually there to make sure I don’t shove it in my face… It’s still nice to be able to vent about the food’s existence.  

It’s been nice seeing that silly scale go back down too! The first week I had an eight pound drop (Just by eating clean!) and since then it’s been about a steady 2 pounds. 

Eating clean has become a lifestyle for me.  I decided that working out was no longer optional –it’s scheduled into my day just like my job/classes.  There’s no avoiding it. I just show up. For myself.  That’s the key.  You have to do this for you.  You gotta dig deep and make that commitment and say that your goals are more important than your excuses.  

When I put that bikini on again for my 30 day progress pictures I felt so much more confident than I did on day 1.  Seriously, eating whole foods that are good for my body has even raised my self esteem and positive body image! Maybe I don’t look like your definition of sexy but hey, I worked hard for that body and those results.  I can’t wait to see what progress I make in the next 30 days!

Look at her go!! 

Through this process I've learned a lot about my body image. I've always struggled with it. Now that I've lost weight the biggest thing I've had to come to terms with is sizes. I'm not a large anymore, but I choose them because I felt comfortable, they hid me better. Tatum kept telling me and nagging at me that I was a medium and needed to accept it.  She got harsh with me and thats what I needed. So I broke down when I was in the store the other day, I grabbed a large tank top off the shelf and was getting ready to check out, but I decided to go back get the medium and try it on. It fit. I was proud, that I tried and that I wasn't pouring myself into a size of clothing that clearly didn't fit just to brag about me being an omg size medium. But it fit, I wasn't uncomfortable, I was happy. Thus I decided to brave the waters and declare all tank tops for me size medium.

The second official medium tank in my collection.

Hows your body image?

Go  HERE to see how good yours is! I took it today and it says my image is soaring high, but 30 days ago I know it would of been a lot more negative. As a reward for our progress Tatum and I are getting these tanks:

And I will be ordering a medium.

Do you reward yourself for progress? How so?

And last but not least a workout! (Sorry this has been like the longest blog post on record.)

This is the workout the hubs has been doing lately and loving it. He had me make up something that would hit all aspects from cardio to lifting to help him lose the non-beer gut.

Now get out there and workout!!!

Hows your week going? How about your challenges?

-J

The Adult Life & Easter Giveaway WInner

And Monday rears its head again, but all is well because these beautiful warm days followed by stormy nights has been amazing! The hub and I off today to take part in some moving fun, we are also going to my parents for a "family meeting". BUT First let me take a selfie let's announce the winner of the Jelly Bean Guess!

There were 157 yummy jelly beans in here that I had to throw away, whomp whomp!

And Surprisingly KRISTIN O. guessed correctly!!! If no one got the exact number the next closest guess would of got it. But hot dang Kristin must be a wizard.

So we are off today for a family meeting. Which is pretty hard to grasp I guess. My parents are going over the details of their finally wishes, what they want done with their properties and all that jazz. Which is just hard to grasp by the fact that I know have to accept my parents are getting older and things can change at any moment- but I don't want to think on that.

We also have to tag our car in the county we are moving to, register our new address for a PO Box, start changing address, and start the purge of the house. When I moved out for college and into my first apartment I just had minimal items from my bedroom, then I loaded up my focus with scores from the goodwill and freebies on craigslist. Then of course when I moved in with my now hub, I took all that furniture back to goodwill and let it cycle to the next round of college kids. We bought all our new furnishings together. So if you have any moving advice at all please do tell. Best way to pack? Boxes or rubbermaid containers? Organized? ANYTHING!? 

Tomorrow is Tatum and I's 30th day in our Bikini challenge. Wednesday I will have a post up checking in with both of us, our day one to day 30 pictures and some workouts for you! Hows everyone elses challenges going??

Well I guess I need to start the adult thing, it sure looked more fun when I was little...

How was your Easter weekend?

-J

April Birchbox

Finally Friday!

This week flew by for me! Lately everyday is flying by, we are in the process of getting ready to move to another town 20 minutes away.  We've had our minds wrapped around that and we've been back and forth between the town trying to get things all set before we even begin to move things. I'm totally dreading moving. But every time I move I go through a major purge. This time will be no different, I'll be packing up, throwing away and preparing for a moving sale. It'll be the healthiest spring cleaning spree in all the nation. The hub is on candy mountain charlie because he is switching jobs next month and he is starting to cash in aaallllll his unused vacation days- lucky jerk. He will be living out every Xbox loving guys' dream- getting paid to play video games all day and you don't even have to put on pants. I'll be working away. I do have to say I'm very proud of him for going to the gym now for two whole weeks straight! He's had me make up some workouts for him, I'll post those next week. Also be sure to go HERE to get in your entry for the Cyclone Cup giveaway!

I got my Birchbox in the mail yesterday, to see past boxes go HERE.

This month I received:

Gilchrist & Soames Spa Therapy Body Wash

It smelled like a rainy day and didn't leave my skin dry or oily. You just can't go wrong with a good body wash.

Miss Jessie's Original Transitioner's Magic

First off I love all of Miss Jessie's Products, please please look her up and my love goes far past the name. This particular product helps chemically treated hair look refreshed, less damaged and kills the fridge. Every single one of her products smells amazing!! People actually will come smell my hair because they can smell it when I'm just standing 5 feet away.

Paula's Choice RESIST Anti-Aging Clear Skin Hydrator

This beautiful gelle moisturizes as it kills of bacteria that causes zits and takes away oil and shine. Your skin has a matte finish and feel fresh. SO important to wash your face and keep it clean unless you want to feed the zitty zits.

Sumita Color Contrast Eyeliner

The eyeliners come in colors to make the color of your eyes POP. I got deep purple for my blue eyes and to try it out I wore it, no eye shadow ( I usually wear a gold tone to make my eyes stand out) and I got three compliments from complete strangers on how pretty my eyes were! Its a soft waxy like pencil so it went on smooth and didn't scratch!

KIND Healthy Grain Bar- Maple Pumpkin Seed with Sea Salt

I have always loved KIND bars, but because of my meal plan, I couldn't try it- enter husband, stage left.  He said he didn't want it, took one bite "for my sake" and the proceeded to eat the whole thing and ask if there were more. I'd say it was good...

Do you receive Birchboxes?

What are your weekend plans?

-J

I hope everyone has very Happy Easter, who's going to eat a Reese's Egg or some Jelly Beans for me??

Clean Eating- The Good the Cravings and the Progress

HUMP DAY!

Clean eating- its the fad of the fitness/health world. It's no wonder it is either, it does great for a person. Everyone has their own definition of what "clean eating" is, everyone adjust the parameters to fit their lifestyle and their goals.

This is what it means to me.

And here is another definition.

There are also different forms- paleo, mediterranean, etc.

Now you know the basics. Clean eating doesn't have to be perfect, with every ingredient fresh from the organic happy farm. I use frozen broccoli, broccoli is the only ingredient, but for me thats just an easy convenience. I also go back and forth between fresh green beans and canned green beans, yeah they aren't perfect but neither am I. 

I've been eating clean for over three weeks, this is my fourth week. I eat clean about 95% of the time. I have a weekly cheat meal, now it is a cheat but I don't go hog wild and cruise through Taco Bell for a 12 pack. I get something I WANT but that isn't ridiculous. Last time I had a chicken fajita wrap and sweet potato fries. Clean? No. Delicious? Yes. I don't eat like that all the time, it was a treat, it was portioned and it took care of all my cravings. Never deny yourself a cheat meal, telling yourself you won't allow yourself this at all for the next X amount of weeks etc. doesn't help you, it makes you want it worse, and if you like food like I do ( A LOT) you have to take it day by day. Focus on getting through one day, before you focus on the next. I also like to plan out my cheat meal, I make it like a goal. So when I want to cheat and snack I think NO wait to the cheat meal. It also motivates me to get through my workouts, the hub and I will talk about what we want to eat on Friday during cardio. Yeah we're lame.

I get cravings like crazy and its hard to keep on track sometimes. My hub has fruit gushers in the cabinet, oh laaaawd. I can't tell you how many times I've opened the cabinet and looked at them, or got the package out arguing with myself as to why I should have them. Or the one time I got them out, opened them and then just took them to the hub. He thought I was being sweet, I was just trying to keep up my will power. I like to chew gum to get my mind off of cravings. I'm never hungry- just bored. That was a big part of my problem when I was overweight. I wasn't hungry, I saw it, it looked good and then I ended up eating it, being stuffed and having a stomach ache.

When I ate the crappy foods, I felt happy- mentally because I was eating Reese's, Mozzarella sticks and all the crunchwraps I could handle. But my body felt like crap, I lacked energy, I was moody and well flat out I'd turn super bitch in the snap of a finger. The last three weeks I've been dedicated to my meal plan, to working out 5 days a week and I feel so good. My energy level is up, I tend to sleep better (easier to fall asleep and less waking up) and I'm just in an all around happier mood.  I pee a billion times a day due to my water consumption BUT I don't get beer bellies, caffeine crashes or any of that non fun stuff.

This is 3 weeks progress. Even my trainer commented on how awesome my stomach is toning up! Thats my trouble area and the part that I'm the most insecure about so seeing progress there makes me happy!

What kind of guidelines do you follow for healthy eating?

Whats your favorite cheat meal?

-J

Bikini Challenge Check In and Easter Giveaway!

Happy Monday!

After a crazy weekend of work and the specialty prom hair I can breathe a sigh of relief today. I have the day off and this gal will be food prepping and house cleaning. With Easter coming up this weekend, I have a busy week followed by some time off, yay! My sister and my niece will be back at my parents house so I will get to see them. I'm 22, have no kids, I only have a niece and a nephew, holiday shopping can be a little tough for me, because psh, I don't know what kids want?! And both of them live over 2 hours away so seeing them a lot makes it tough. But I found a loophole, Toys'R'us has free in store pick up and luckily Wichita and Kansas City have Toys'R'Us. I was able to pick out Easter gifts for each of them and have them sent to the stores for my family to pick up and give to them on Sunday!  Thank goodness for the internet! 

Today is the beginning of week 4 of my Bikini challenge! Read about all the details HERE and see my befores. I forgot to take my week two pictures last Sunday, so I here are Week one and Week Three pictures, a two week differences between the two.

I also was able to feel the success of a Non Scale Victory today, I've been wearing yoga pants to the gym to get more sweat pumping, and I've been wearing jean shorts on the regular days. I put on a pair of my nike shorts for the first time in weeks and they were super loose compared to normal. That made me smile pretty big. Its not always about the number on the scale, the inches and toning play such a huge part in the process too.

What are some of your non scale victories?

Who's ready for some Easter FUNNN??

The majority of the population know how much I love my Cyclone Cup, and they just added THREE new fun colors to their line up.

So for Easter I filled my cyclone cup with jelly beans, The person who either guesses the number of jelly beans or gets the closest will win a FREE Cyclone cup in a color of their choice! You have until Saturday April 19th at Midnight to enter, Sunday I will determine a winner and the winner will be announced on Monday the 21st! Comment your guess below, make sure that you also include your email address incase you are the winner!! (Limit one guess per person, US residents only please :D )

(Note, the mixer is not in here, there are only Jelly Beans filling the space!)

Happy Guessing!!

How was your weekend?

-J

Prom Weekend and Your Questions Answered!

TGIF!

I get my cheat meal today and that is what I'm most excited for, that and well I guess spending time with the hub. We are up to our normal no good, groceries, movie and dinner. I have to get my hands nimble for all the prom hair tomorrow. I have a love hate relationship with prom updo's. There are the people that don't understand that when they bring me a picture of like Taylor Swift long curly hair and they have hair to their chin...its just not possible- unless they want to look like a muppet character.

 BUT I love dramatic hair and makeup, like prom or for photo shoots ect.  When I was in school I placed second in the state for Updo/Makeup.

If you can't tell we did a peacock theme :P

I really like to do out of the box things also like this:

This was for a sugar skull/day of the dead photo shoot that I got to do hair and makeup on. So doing some prom hair tomorrow, is actually exciting for me.

--------------------

I also had posted on Instagram that I wanted to hear some of your questions! And now here they are, answered and all!!

What amount of advice/tips/Communication do you get being on team Mshell?

I have Michelle's cell number and I can text or call her anytime I need her. She's really awesome about being there for her girls and keeping contact with her. She also has a blog and super awesome instagram account!

I wanna know your arms/back/chest/shoulder workouts!

I can't say my actual workouts because they are Michelle's and they're protected. BUT I will say that when I work any of them, I always start with cardio for a warm up and my favorite moves are:

Supinated Curls

Dumbbell Rows

Lateral Pull Downs

Cable Rows

Delt Fly's

90 Degree Chest

Front Raises

Dumbbell Shoulder Press

Overhead Extensions/ French Curls

Hyperextensions

Those are all good for those muscle groups! I usually do 4 sets of 10 of each move or 3 sets of 15!

Best advice for busting a plateau?

This can be tough, but I always start with changing the amount of calories I'm intaking,  the foods I'm eating and my workouts. Your body gets complacent doing the same thing over and over again, so if you throw it a curve ball and confuse it, it will have to start working harder to figure out what's going on. Also this is why its okay to have a cheat meal occasionally, it will spike your metabolism.

What water bottle do you use for powders?

I use Cyclone Cup. I hands down think it is the absolute best shaker cup. In fact if you come back Monday, I'm doing a giveaway for Easter involving Cyclone Cups. If you've never heard of them be sure to check them out!

You stay so positive, how do you deal with/get up from one of "those days" where you feel discouraged?

Thats tough. I do try to stay positive in general. I naturally have a pretty optimistic view on the world and try to find the positive in any and all situations. When I get really down thats when I surf pinterest for motivation, take a "me" day- get a pedicure, nails done, massage or whatever. I also go back and look at my progress and think "huh, I've done this already, I need to keep on keepin' on". It also never hurts to have a best friend and a husband that you can text. And quite frankly there are some problems that only chocolate can solve!

What do you eat when you go out? On Holidays? Cravings?

If we go out to eat, I look for the healthier options on the menu, steak and veggies, chicken and rice, chicken sandwich with sweet potato fries, and enormous taco salads. If I'm having a cheat meal, I'll go a little further and get something less healthy. But I watch the portions. There is nothing wrong with treating yourself to a good meal every now and then. You want to watch your portions not starve yourself.

Holidays- I luck out on that one. My mom is vegan and my dad is diabetic, so meals at their house is healthy as is. Now with my hubs side of the family, I pick and choose or bring my own and allow myself treats by fitting it into my macros. Just because the food is there doesn't mean you have to eat it. I'll make a healthier dish and bring it along, no one ever objects to food! 

Cravings- Arctic Zero Ice Cream, Frozen Yogurt, Quest Cravings PB Cups, Fiber One Cereal with PB2 and milk. I just find options that aren't to bad for me but still allow me the yummy points. FroYo is my absolute favorite one. The hubs knows flowers won't make my heart melt like a bowl of fro yo will!

Would you ever host a meet up?

Who would want to meet me anyways?

No but really, I'm always up for meeting people, If I'm in your area, or you're in mine or if you see me randomly, stop and talk to me and we can go get coffee or something!! As for a formal meet up, I'd love to take place in one and just meet a bunch of people with common interests and goals! Anyone know of any meetups happening this year?!

If you have any more questions never hesitate to ask!

What are your weekend plans??

-J